A War of Words

I have literally spent the last four days in an online, email war with my brother-in-law. I hate fighting, with anyone, but it's worse with family. You expect them to respect you and your opinion instead of treating you like some street-corner idiot who doesn't know their left hand from their right.

Last Thursday we went out for our ritual family dinner. The cast included me, my husband, my son and his partner, my dad and my brother-in-law and sister-in-law. Everyone except me, Ronnie and Daddy was drinking and according to ALL of them, it only took one margarita to make them drunk. Maybe that's where the trouble began...

Someone (Ryan) brought up something about politics and the fight was on. I stayed out of it...at the time. My in-laws are staunch liberal democrats as is my son and his partner. My husband is firmly conservative Republican and I am an entrenched conservative independent. My dad...all I know is that he liked Obama and now he doesn't. Ronnie, Ryan and Glen got into a "discussion" regarding whether things have improved since Obama took office. You can see the many red flags developing here. In an effort to bring things to an end I put my wallet away, pushed my chair back and said, "The only politician I would give a dime for is Ralph Hall." My brother-in-law immediately asked, "Why?" I said, "Because I believe him to be a man of integrity." He shot back, "Why?" I saw red. He continued on berating Hall for switching from the democratic party to the republican party and all the reasons why he thought it was wrong. I said, "Then we will agree to disagree on this matter because you are not changing my mind about a man I have worked side by side with and have personal knowledge of." The end. Right?

The following evening, Friday, I got an email from said BIL with a wikipedia definition of integrity and an excerpt from a news clipping quoting Hall on his change of parties. My head spun around, my eyes bugged out, my tongue shot out of my mouth...split into two and did battle with itself, steam poured out of my ears and my face turned purple. Don't treat me as if I am a moron. I damn well know what integrity is, thank you. I sent back a very restrained email in which I said, "Don't send me anymore of this. I disagree with your position and my opinion is every bit as valid as yours." The end again, right?

The following day I got an email saying, "This is fact, not opinion. Opinion should be based on fact." I responded immediately with, "No...this is political bullying and that is a fact! Respect my wishes and stop sending this crap." Finally the end, right?

Today I got another email which said, "You are being way too sensitive...." It went on to tell me that integrity is an issue with him and if I had said Hall was a personal friend or something else that would have been different. Blah, blah, blah. He included a cartoon about online bullying. I sent another email which said, basically, "No. I am not being way too sensitive. I assumed it was over at the restaurant when I said we will agree to disagree. YOU continued it when you sent an email basically telling me that I am too stupid to know what integrity is so you will not only define it for me but you will give me an example of why I am wrong." I said some other stuff, too, about my opinions being as valid as anyone else's and that bullying is an issue with me. I ended it with another statement about agreeing to disagree. Well, actually I ended it with a smartass comment..."Thanks for the lecture on political bullying. I was too ignorant to know what that is so thanks for setting the record straight. Then I indicated that I was joking...which I kinda was...but not completely. Please tell me that is the end of it. It is...right?

So much bullshit and for what purpose?