Flu, Flu...go away!

Flu season has hit...hard. It seems that everywhere I go I am surrounded by that nasty little bugger. Every day for the last two weeks I have been kept busy subbing for either a teacher who had the flu or whose children had the flu. Snotty noses, blowing crud, sneezing, coughing GERMS. It's enough to make you paranoid or germaphobic...or maybe that's the drugs I'm taking.

On Thursday morning I awoke with that ridiculous allergic reaction rash snaking its way around my neck. Woke with it at 3:00 a.m. but was able to go back to sleep only vaguely aware that I was clawing troughs in my skin until my alarm went off at 6:00 a.m. I jumped out of bed and ran to the kitchen to take a Zyrtek...after all, it worked last time. In my haste to defeat this itchy, burn looking crud which insists on manifesting itself at inopportune times and in highly visible places, I neglected to remember that Zyrtek is a nightime medication.

Arriving at the school of the day, I checked in, went to the room, read through the plans and waited to greet the first students of the day. That's when it started. That fuzzy headed feeling. Thirty minutes later I was in full Zyrtek state...dizzy, sluggish, sleepy....feeling like I was swimming in syrup. The biggest problem, as I saw it, was that I had no idea which school I was at or which teacher I was subbing for. I literally went blank for a short period of time. Scary, huh? Not one child appeared to notice. So I think I pulled it off. Even when I went back the next day to the same classroom (without the aide of Zyrtek) no one commented on my "hyperalert" status of the day before. Know how when you're feeling a little tipsy and you don't want anyone to know it? Know how you're ultra cautious with your walk, your speech, every little movement? Not that I would know, of course, but that's the way I was moving about on Thursday...mostly in an effort to keep from sitting down and lapsing into an unconscious sleep. So, like I said, no one appeared to notice. Or, maybe, they were too damned scared to bring it up...afraid that I would turn back into the zombie of the day before and suck out their eyeballs.

Whatever, it was a good week and, crossing my fingers, that old flu bug is keeping me working and making money and leaving me alone in the process (that could be the gallons of germ-x I'm using). No, Mr. Flu bug, I am not taunting you. I am recognizing your superior status and asking you to kindly stay away. Thank you.